ADVICE ON HOW
TO SLEEP WELL on HALLOWEEN NIGHT

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The thing to remember when you go to bed
Is hang strings of garlic high over your head,
So werewolves and vampires won't come to call.
In fact you won't get many callers at all
'Cause garlic is smelly, besides its success
With magical creatures who visit distress
On humans who read scary stories at night,
And sleep in their bedrooms without a night-light.

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The thing to remember when you go to bed
Is putting a cross at your foot and your head,
'Cause witches and vampire bats are religious
And touching a sign like a cross gives them hideous
Goosebumps and warts, hives, the welts and the itches,
Which nobody likes, even vampire bats and witches.
But try not to toss or to turn in your bed.
If you kick off the crosses you're gonna wake dead.

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The thing to remember when you go to bed
Is watch out for goblins who munch on your head.
What stops them is water, so ask for a glass,
Then pour it around so the goblins can't pass.
Or else make a run for the bathroom and turn
On the hot and cold faucets and watch goblins squirm.
As a last chance, since goblins all fear running streams,
If you don't own a bathroom, dream water-filled dreams.

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So---that's my advice. Now just turn off the light.
Hope you sleep well the next Halloween Night!


Twilight

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